Well, thank fuck for that.
There I was, going into pubs and bars without the slightest clue about how to behave inside. I used to drift around aimlessly, wondering why everyone else seemed to be having such a good time.
But luckily the owner of one of the pubs near my office has had the good sense to make life much simpler for the likes of me, and I daresay, millions of other hapless souls.
Why can't other pubs and bars follow this eminently sensible lead?
I especially like 'relax'.
It almost sounds like an order.
Maybe they should write appropriate words on every building so there's no doubt as to what to do inside.
For instance, an office block could have... WORK.
A gym... SWEAT
A swimming pool... FLOAT
A library... SHHHH!
No, no, that would be really stupid.